Dating Scam

There’s a newish app called Hinge. I’ve been on and off it and I find it very, very strange. But I have friends who say that it works for them.

I find that I consistently get the same type of scam. Now, if there is actually a scam I wouldn’t know because I smell something and cut it off quickly. But it sure feels like a scam to me.

The man is generally in my age range, handsome and fit. They want to get off the app quickly. Their English never seems quite right to me. Obviously I’m well spoken and well written so I pick up on these particular nuances relatively quickly.

They are always in the oil business or the army. They are away from home. They are ALWAYS widowed with a young daughter. The daughter is away at boarding school.

Now, if I lived in, let’s say, Hong Kong, I wouldn’t think twice about someone saying their child is in boarding school. But here, in the USA, this is very uncommon. Especially when it’s a small child. Sure it’s possible, but it smells off to me.

The story fits, a single Dad who is deployed offshore somewhere would need his child cared for full time in a boarding school.

This happens over and over and over and I never get past the initial story because it reeks of scam to me. One of these days I may try to carry it forward just to see what they are trying to get from their prey. Money?

They always ask a question along the lines of “do you live alone?”

It only seems to happen on Hinge. It’s not happened on the other apps.

And you know what bugs me more than the creepy scam man? The poor English! 😂🙄

Author: Madeline Harper

My journey through divorce and an emotional and sexual reawakening. Love, laughter, friendships, family and heartbreak included. And there is sex, lots of it, so close your eyes and turn the page if that's not for you! While I started this blog as an endeavor to journal my thoughts and feelings in an attempt to better understand myself, it has become an amazing platform from which I have met some of the most interesting and wonderful people in my life. My path is often crooked, but I hope you will share in the journey with me.

17 thoughts on “Dating Scam”

  1. I get Facebook requests similar to this several times per week. Usually a really handsome guy with an easy name like John Anderson or David Cook. They are always claiming to be in the military, have pics of small children they claim to be their daughters, always widowers, and almost always from Texas. It’s so, so predictable. Oh… they also have lots of very flattering pics but all posted on the same day and have only been on FB for a day or two.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Omg I totally should have included the names – always super simple like you said!

      I wrote the post because after a guy gave me the spiel today I said there’s so many scammers. And he asked what kind – so I fed back his whole story and he just said I had trust issues and disappeared.

      I’m dying to know what they’re after!!


  2. I’ve herad claims that scammers will often use poor English (or I presume whatever other language) deliberately. It acts as a filter: someone who is switched-on enough to spot gramatical and spelling errors is probably switched-on enought to spot a scam. They are therefore harder to dupe that someone who is perhaps less educated / inteligent / suspicious. And you should never click on the link because you don’t want to get lured into reading related posts. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Whyle I’ve got yor gullible attention, I’ve got 10M Naira that I need to get converted to Rubles. If you send mee yore bank account number, password and your muthas maiden, name I will send you the money any you can keep harf of it.

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Sounds pretty scammy to me. I know scammers study what things will make someone more susceptible to being scammed and many people fall prey to scams so I don’t think that they think about their methods being instantly suspicious by those who are really paying attention. If it sounds too good to be true, well, it probably isn’t true and for me, crappy language use is an immediate red flag and if you see it enough, you can tell when a translation program has been used.

    I’ve been on some dating apps and I’ve seen this from “foreign women” looking for a good American man and, yeah, their stories are way too similar to be coincidental; my junk mail often gets loaded up with these scams and, yeah, sometimes, I actually look at them (safely) so that I can see what dirty tricks scammers are up to these days.

    They can’t fool me… but a lot of people do get fooled.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. These are definitely scammers. The TV series The Weekly…produced by NY Times…recently did a powerful and very sad expose on Nigerian scammers who connected with a 50 something woman in the US posing as a man in the military using a similar profile to what you all have shared…widower…young children…stationed out of country…slightly awkward use of English…not wrong but just off enough to someone tuned in on those things. The woman was married and developed a deep and intimate online relationship…sent money, etc. Her husband discovered and murdered her and then committed suicide. The reporters on this story actually tried to track down the “guy” in Nigeria. It was a very powerful piece of investigative journalism. The episode was called “Connecting the World”…I highly recommend it and a number of the other episodes.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Wow! I have to take a look at that. Thanks for sharing.

      I assumed they are all about making a connection and ultimately asking for money. They all want “soul mates”. It’s just all way too fishy and I truly don’t understand how people fall for it.


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