This is a first. I suppose inevitable but, still, it feels strange.
I feel a bit needy for affection, which is typical M. It comes and goes. I am definitely more horny than I have been in over a year.
I have zero desire to reach out to Tony.
Don’t know when that happened but definitely within the month of August as I was certainly thinking of him fondly around his birthday which is August 8th.
I went back today and looked at some of our photos and he’s just a man again. I feel sad more than anything but not compelled to reach out to him because I want sex or affection.
It’s quite strange. He’s had such a hold on my heart for 3 solid years.
Like I said, so much seems to be happening to me all at once, that I feel like something else is around the corner.
But this was a big one. I didn’t feel anything for Tony. Not really. A bit of anger, regret, sadness and still love. It will always be love because I believed in him so deeply.
Just not attraction. Not the lust. Not the need.
A welcome relief.