*Written last week
I made up my mind. I have decided to contact Tony’s wife. I have been reading and reading like crazy so many opinions about do/don’t contact and why.
And I finally decided I am never going to be at peace until she hears the truth. I asked him many months ago, before I had my breakdown, to tell her. He promised he would. This was the only way I could avoid having this obsessive need to tell her myself.
Here’s my email to her:
If you are curious what changed my mind it was this website:
And a website called Chump Lady.
I guess I hadn’t decided because something is stopping me from sending it – and believe me that send button has been under my thumb more than once this week.
I’m just sitting on it. Perhaps the feeling will pass. Perhaps it won’t.
I realize there is no gain from this text to his wife. I try to keep mulling over in my head why I feel so strongly about outing him. I know part of it stems from pure rage that he gets to live his life free and clear after 20 years of continued cheating and the wreckage he left of me.
Then I think: who cares.
If I could surgically remove these thoughts and feelings of him I would opt to at this point. I would even go back to Mexico! (Not ever!)