Date 4 | Results: Relative Fail

We met on Tinder or Bumble, can’t recall which and had a decent text exchange over the week.  He seemed kind and asked me out quickly.  His photos seemed “ok” but have learned I am a little more lenient on the looks these days.

He was very flexible about meeting me close to my home as he was visiting his parents not too far away.   I chose a spot and we agreed a time for Saturday night.

I have pretty much learned that I can tell from their first look if they like me or not.  I was pretty certain he didn’t like what he saw almost immediately, but he was good at working with it.  He ordered my drink, secured a seat at the bar and suggested we plan for dinner.  I assume, if he really disliked me, he wouldn’t have suggested dinner so I think we both figured it was a nice place and nice enough company.

He had eyebrows that were so dark and so ungroomed they distracted me.  I couldn’t even see what colors his eyes were because those eyebrows distracted me.  He was clearly raised in significant wealth, and wanted me to know it.

Conversation wasn’t easy or natural.  I had to think of things to say and ask a lot of questions.  Generally speaking, people get going when it’s about their school, family, or job….but he was not so easy.  I pulled enough out of him but I felt the strain in  doing so.  I also notice I tend to talk too much to fill those gaps and I don’t enjoy that either.

When he asked me if I “took my husband for all he was worth in the divorce” I think he saw the disgust cross my face.  He made another comment that in divorce “that’s usually what the woman does.”   He also made a derogatory comment about divorced families and dysfunction and I was pretty much entirely done with attempting polite conversation by that point.  I don’t think he even understood that my divorce my was my x coming after me for money, because clearly, inhis circles, the men make the wealth.

Still, dinner was yummy and I had my fill of prosecco, careful not to drink much.

I think the whole date was under 2 hours, including cocktails and dinner, and we had a chaste kiss on the lips and goodnight.

I sent a thank you text, as I always do, and he replied with a thank you back.

I don’t expect to hear from him, and that’s ok with me!

The date was failed from the moment we met, but at least we managed mostly civil conversation (albeit not interesting or very engaging) and dinner and drinks get and A+.

Author: Madeline Harper

My journey through divorce and an emotional and sexual reawakening. Love, laughter, friendships, family and heartbreak included. And there is sex, lots of it, so close your eyes and turn the page if that's not for you! While I started this blog as an endeavor to journal my thoughts and feelings in an attempt to better understand myself, it has become an amazing platform from which I have met some of the most interesting and wonderful people in my life. My path is often crooked, but I hope you will share in the journey with me.

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