Date 3 | Update: A Second Date

I figured after the breadcrumb incident last week I would eventually hear from Dave at some point.  I knew he was starting a new job and had been very distracted, but I was growing weary of his last minute plans.

It took a week, but I heard from him early Saturday morning with a pleasant “Hello, How are you?” and a quick follow up to make plans for my next free days.

I was just about ready for the roundabout when I gave him my free times, but we surprisingly agreed to a brunch on Sunday morning.  The funny thing was, after we agreed on a day, the time became an issue and I felt the whole thing swirling again.  I put my foot down and said “I can do 11am, no earlier” and didn’t answer his two subsequent messages for the duration of the day.

When I woke in the morning, I sent a text that said, I can meet you at 11am, are we still on?  He answered immediately and said he moved his PT appt (he did not mention why he was pushing for any earlier brunch the night before) and had more time to spend with me.

Maybe he’s just a poor communicator?  I don’t even care that much.

I got up, got dressed and headed towards him on a perfectly divine Sunday morning.

He met me at a corner, jumped int he car, and showed me exactly where to park so the car was safe.  Then we had a short stroll to a lovely brunch.  Conversation is easy, not particularly enticing, but nice.  He is very easy on the eyes.

Is there a spark?  Not really, not without physical engagement.  When we kiss there are more than enough sparks, but I tend to like that excitement that comes from the intellectual chemistry.  He is a consummate gentleman which is very nice.

We had a lovely long walk after breakfast and he offered to show me his apartment before I left, and to use the bathroom and have some drinks.  He was in no way pressuring me and I felt comfortable.  We spent a little time fooling around on the couch and I can easily see having sex with him.  He knows what to do and I can tell how much I excite him.  He absolutely didn’t cross any lines but we had a pretty fantastic make-out session!

He isn’t open or closed in terms of sharing things.  He is neither aggressive or too gentle physically.  He just is.

I don’t necessarily feel very much.  I like him.  I like being with him, but there’s no pull for me.

It’s also 2 dates in 3 weeks or so.  We don’t speak much in between (phone not at all, text only).  I don’t feel like I know “who” he is and can’t really get a sense of him, which is strange as I am generally pretty good with reading people.

That’s it.  That’s all there is to tell.  A nice second date.  Maybe some more breadcrumbs later this week.

I have been feeling a little sad about Bennett this week, maybe it’s the change in weather, maybe it’s the length of time we haven’t spoken….but I am feeling the separation more keenly.   I didn’t think about Bennett while with Dave, but he’s on my mind now.  I suppose its normal, but makes me wonder how ready and open I really am for anything more serious than light dating at the moment.

Author: Madeline Harper

My journey through divorce and an emotional and sexual reawakening. Love, laughter, friendships, family and heartbreak included. And there is sex, lots of it, so close your eyes and turn the page if that's not for you! While I started this blog as an endeavor to journal my thoughts and feelings in an attempt to better understand myself, it has become an amazing platform from which I have met some of the most interesting and wonderful people in my life. My path is often crooked, but I hope you will share in the journey with me.

11 thoughts on “Date 3 | Update: A Second Date”

  1. Maybe you’re not ready for anything more than light dating right now? I don’t know that it is a bad thing, I mean, having a little fun until things become more obvious seems like the way to go.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I believe you need more than one man to date. Have some fun, mix it up a bit, even if it turns into nothing. After all, that’s what casual dating is. Some guys may turn out to be someone to just be friends with, have drinks or dinner with, discuss life/dating etc and no more. Others may be into only casual sex or as the young folks say, “fuck buddies.” Then there are those looking for a real LTR. Even if you’re unsure precisely what you want (and why even decide right now?) what’s wrong with just seeing what’s out there in the age group you desire. I think you’re doing all the right things and a little sadness is perfectly valid as long as it does not drive you right back to Bennett.

    Liked by 1 person

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