How to Make A Bloody Mess

This post is literal and graphic.  So anyone (men) with weak stomachs for the inner workings of a womans system better not read ahead.

You have been warned.


Finnian made it home with me, got me into the house and into my bed.  There wasn’t any discussion about him heading home.  Or maybe there was.  I don’t know.  I don’t care.  We got in bed.  We fooled around.  He got another blow job and gave me some pretty good head.  It’s all good.

We fell asleep.

Until I woke up around 5am in a pool of blood.  A fucking pool, a olympic size pool.  None of this little stain or drip crap.  I was swimming in blood.  Fucking gross.

So, here I am, man in bed, looking like Carrie just dumped the vat of pigs blood on the prom…what do I do?  I get up, clean up, lay down a towel and get back into bed.

An hour later I’m up again.  Soaked again.

Wash. Rinse. Repeat.

Twice more before he finally awakes and I have to admit, to my mortification, why I was just about sleeping on top of him at that point in my king size bed.  He could care less.

Honestly, not once through the ordeal I am about to write did he blink an eye. Not once.

We snuggled a bit and by now, since I was awake, I could feel the blood pouring out of me.  I was soaking through two ultra size tampons AND a pad every 15 minutes for hours.

We got out of bed and I pulled off the sheets and things to wash.  I also made a call to the doctor because I was losing so much blood.

We made some coffee and breakfast together.  I would have cooked for him but he was insistent on helping.  We had a lovely breakfast on the back deck in the cool but bright sunlight.

I was still up and running to the bathroom every 15 minutes.

The doctor called and I am sure Finnian heard most of the conversation as the bathroom window was open and I didn’t notice until halfway through the conversation.  At this point it didn’t even matter to me, there was nothing I could do to hide what was happening to my body.  Honestly, I would have preferred he leave, but it just didn’t happen.  Eventually I gave up on being worried about what he thought of me.  He stayed at his own risk.

We don’t know what was wrong, but I was told to stop the blood thinners for two days and go to the hospital if I felt faint or dizzy for an extended period.  Drink lots of water.  Relax.  It was probably just the stress on my body from waiting on the lay offs.  My period was about a week early which was also unusual.  Maybe even a cyst burst, but I had no pain, no cramps at all.  Just volumes and volumes of blood, pouring out of me at a very rapid pace.

Finnian wanted to know what he could do to help.  But there was nothing. He cleared the table and washed the dishes.  He made me a cup of tea.  He sat next to me on the couch and petted me.  I knew I needed a nap and he knew the bed was unmade, so he went to my dryer, pulled out the sheets and made the bed.  While he was doing so, I managed to clog the toilet after dumping a box of ultra tampons down it all day.  While the water was clear it wasn’t flushing.  Finn cleared the toilet.  I showered and he tucked me into bed.  He said he wasn’t leaving me.  I was so sleepy at this point, turning noticeably pale, and beginning to feel light-headed that I asked him if he would like a shower.  He showered and came to sleep beside me.

I don’t know if or how much he slept, but I fell into a very deep sleep for two solid hours.  I woke up to no blood soaking through.  I felt much better.  We cuddled a bit and pulled out my vibrator for some play.  I had a delightful orgasm with his mouth on my breast and my Hitachi working its quick magic.  It was after this that I had a good look at his body.  While firm and taut from running, he was full of hair.  Completely au natural.  Everywhere.

Oh god, yuck.  Just no.

No. No. No.

N-to-the-O, NO.

There will be no more blow jobs.  Not until that hair comes off.  I sort of recalled pushing the long hair out of my way the night before, but that’s what I get for being drunk.  He’s lucky I was that drunk because there is no way in daylight I’m going down on him again.

How the hell do you have THAT conversation?

I played it off from tiredness and he wasn’t fussed in the least.

Now he wanted to stay again to take me back into the city for tonight’s friend frenzy.  This time I was quite firm and made him leave.  That’s enough.

I told him I would let him know when I was leaving, and when I arrived to the city, but he would not hear from me during the evening while I was out with my friends.  No pick ups tonight.  This had already gone further and faster than I would have liked with him and I could see how much he liked me.  While I do like him, it stops there.  No butterflies, little chemistry, no heat, or not enough heat.  His other qualities currently outweight the passion piece considering my frame of mind from the layoffs, but I’m aware it needs to slow down so he doesn’t get hurt.

My plans for the evening drastically changed when one of the girls from the night before remained sick all day.  One casualty out of six.  One girlfriend and I, my closest single girlfriend actually, decided on a low-key evening at a familiar bar.  I took an Uber and met her in the city for a few more drinks and some chatter for a couple of hours.

My girlfriend, Boo, is younger than me by almost 10 years, has worked for me for at least 10 years and has become one of my closest friends in the world.  While we are as different as night and day, I love, respect and adore her like no other.  She is honest, loyal, loving and dependable.  Any night with her is a fun night and I enjoy the time I spend with her.  I have traveled the world with her and we get along quite well.

While I was in the Uber on the way to the city, my fingers got itchy.  Mr. Electricity had been texting since Finn left and talking sex all afternoon.  While he doesn’t have good sexting skills, the talk still had me worked up and my mind racing.

I knew that my Crush was back from his vacation and I made the (fatal?) mistake of sending him a text “Hey, Welcome home.”  Since we will be talking about my Crush in upcoming posts, let’s introduce him properly as Mario.

Of course, Mario replied almost immediately.

The smile spread across my face as my weekend just kept getting better.




Author: Madeline Harper

My journey through divorce and an emotional and sexual reawakening. Love, laughter, friendships, family and heartbreak included. And there is sex, lots of it, so close your eyes and turn the page if that's not for you! While I started this blog as an endeavor to journal my thoughts and feelings in an attempt to better understand myself, it has become an amazing platform from which I have met some of the most interesting and wonderful people in my life. My path is often crooked, but I hope you will share in the journey with me.

13 thoughts on “How to Make A Bloody Mess”

  1. That’s a pretty cool guy to hang through Normandy (my husband’s and my term for it) so early on. Still – I would have been feeling the same way, like leave already, so early in the dating. Looking forward to more stories from your dance card. 😉

    Liked by 2 people

  2. First any post with gory details and lots of blood have to be my favorites. But honestly I know you are not head over heels for this guy but wow-what a decent man! To do all of that for you without knowing you that well…that’s unheard of! I couldn’t even get my past boyfriends to walk the dog half the time!

    Also as far as the hairy situation goes, I would be up front and honest. I would say hey, to enjoy you even more sexually I think it would be incredible if you shaved. It’s my preference and I’m just not keen on flossing with pubes. It’s a totally fair statement. I don’t wax because I don’t have the time to keep up with it but if a guy says he won’t go down on me if there’s hair then you bet I’m spending some extra time grooming down there before a night out, and for the right guy, I would probably make the time. So if he’s that into you, he will invest in some manscaping!!!

    Also sweetie, I’m so sorry you’re hemorrhaging. Xoxo feel better soon!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I agree he was pretty impressive…I do think he is a good man through and through and the type that would take very good care of me…but that shouldn’t be the reason I stay with him because it’s selfish.

      I agree I have to be honest about the manscaping…I have no doubt he would comply, it’s just awkward to discuss.

      It was a weird thing having all that blood, but it reverted to normal thank goodness.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I think I’ve told you before I work in an OB/GYN office? We have a lot of women in thieir 40’s and 50’s come in with DUB (dysfunctional uterine bleeding). It often happens for no particular reason except that our bodies are trying to figure out the whole menopause thing and whether it’s time or not. Occasionally, it will be bad enough to require a hysterectomy (which is what I did when I had DUB and was bleeding like a stuck pig — best thing I ever did!). Most women can just power through — but it’s a pain because you might have irregular, very heavy periods for a while until menopause kicks in. Also — if you ever have bleeding where you are changing a pad more than every hour, you need to contact the doctor (and depending on how long it’s gone on and how you feel, they might order labwork, want to see you, or recommend you visit the ER).

    Also, regarding the hair situation? If you decide to see him again (and he does sound like a super reliable, nice fellow) — just tell him that you would find it incredibly hot if he would shave or wax that area. I imagine that would turn him on and he would be happy to comply (maybe not with the waxing — I find that men are freaked out about that prospect).

    Liked by 1 person

    1. The hair thing was actually easily resolved as you said.

      Yes, the doctor said as much to me on the phone – my body is probably beginning to adjust and it was also in response to high stress levels.

      Thanks for all the info Jana!


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