Bored, Drunk and Hot Never Leads to Good Behavior

After having my crush cancel on the Opera, and then dealing with his nonsense during the day via text, all of us girls at work were pretty hyper.

Which means only one thing for all of us: drinking.

Perhaps this is why we get along so well because this crowd of work-mates is anywhere from 25-46 years old…so there is a wide breadth of ages across 7 women.

The Prosecco was procured and we started.  The afternoon was quiet and we polished off about 4 bottles or so by 5pm.  We parted ways and I went to a lovely Oyster bar with a friend for a quick bite.

I didn’t know if I wanted to stay in the city or go home – I was a bit torn since my plans had been turned upside down.  I was also in a beautiful dress and sexy-as-fuck shoes.

After the oysters, I decided to head home and meet a friend at home.  I was pleasantly buzzed at this point from all the Prosecco, but not drunk.  When I arrived to the station, there was an accident or something and the lines were out the door and it was way too hot.  I stood and waited for about 25 minutes, playing on Bumble while I was waiting.

A cute guy messaged me back immediately and asked me to meet him for a drink.  I had been standing too long in line, I was hot, and I had been drinking for hours… best senses were reduced to a sweaty mess and I agreed to meet him.

As it turns out, I thought I was meeting him at a bar, but it was his apartment building.  That was fine, and the area was safe, but I should have pin dropped my location to my friends.  I have to remember how to be safe and I take my safety for granted.  All the new dating technology is mind-boggling to me sometimes.  On the other hand, I love that my friends worry about me with a stranger.

He had run out and bought me a bottle of Prosecco while he was waiting for me to get there and met me outside.  I was immediately impressed that he had done so.  The rooftop of his building was really nothing short of spectacular.  I am always humbled by how beautiful my city is.  I could explore it til I die and still never see all the wonderful things it has to offer.

We hit it off immediately, he was nice-looking but perhaps not exactly what I would call handsome.  He looked a bit old for his 48 years and I realized, when he pulled out the cigarette, that was the reason.   I totally take for granted people don’t smoke anymore…I even forget to ask this question!  In my head, I just assume no smoking.  I am allergic to smoke, and my parents were heavy smokers, as is my brother and his wife, and I think it’s just gross.

So the minute he pulled out that cigarette I told him all bets were off but I would be happy to have drinks with him.  I don’t give a shit how that sounded to be honest.  Smoking is a  deal breaker for me.

He wasn’t happy about that and tried his best to convince me how he was looking to quit, kept things clean etc etc.  I still don’t care.  It’s one of the few hard lines I have.

The night progressed with lots of funny stories and we eventually made our way out to dinner.  When he asked me what I would like to eat and I replied “Lobster” he claimed he knew just the place to take me.

When I heard the name, I forewarned him that I didn’t think it was such a great idea, not my type of clientele and suggested two other restaurants in the immediate vicinity.  He was determined, I wasn’t paying, so I conceded.

Yep.  Not a good choice.  The food was fine, but it was a chain restaurant and definitely not my scene.  Once we walked in, he immediately realized his mistake and wanted to leave.  I wasn’t in the mood to backtrack several blocks and I just wanted to eat because it was late and I was now starving and almost drunk.  You can really learn a lot about a person when they don’t know how to handle themselves in a situation like this.  He didn’t want to listen to me, he made his choice, now he needed to make the best of it.  I don’t like a big baby.

I drank more at dinner.  This date was a total wash.  I wanted to leave.

But, we made it back to his apartment and started making out.  I let it go way to far.  We ended up on the bed and my dress was off.  His head was between my legs and I had a comfortable and entirely non-exciting orgasm.  He wanted to have sex without a condom at that point and I said absolutely not.   Rather than get up and get the condom, he went down on me again.  I gave him one slight direction and he actually told me to “hush, he will do it when he’s ready.”  Any man not willing to take gentle sexual direction to help a woman to achieve orgasm is a fool.  So, I let him continue for longer than he needed to and eventually I found another orgasm.  He tried again to have sex with no condom and this time, I slipped away from him.

I needed to get out of there.  I wasn’t even remotely interested in having sex with him, I allowed something to happen which I shouldn’t have, and I couldn’t possibly reciprocate when my disinterest was so apparent.

I excused myself, hurriedly dressed and sort of ran.

He called several times in the Uber on the way home but I didn’t’ answer and blocked and deleted him on the 3rd call.

I don’t feel anything, if truth be told.  I had been worked up to see My Crush since the night before, and the tension of communicating with the Crush all day had built up.  I simply needed a release.  Perhaps it was a bad choice but I don’t really care.  I had lobster for dinner and a gorgeous city view while sipping Prosecco on a warm Spring evening.

Bumble on.



Author: Madeline Harper

My journey through divorce and an emotional and sexual reawakening. Love, laughter, friendships, family and heartbreak included. And there is sex, lots of it, so close your eyes and turn the page if that's not for you! While I started this blog as an endeavor to journal my thoughts and feelings in an attempt to better understand myself, it has become an amazing platform from which I have met some of the most interesting and wonderful people in my life. My path is often crooked, but I hope you will share in the journey with me.

17 thoughts on “Bored, Drunk and Hot Never Leads to Good Behavior”

  1. I’ll just quote Carrie from Sex and the city: “I had sex like a man!” 😉 (regarding to you having the orgasms and then leaving). I’m always a bit wary about going to someone’s home the first time I meet them. But, admittedly, I have done so if it’s been an evening of wine and so on. Easy to let the judgement slip out the wndow then. Oh well, no harm done, I suppose. Glad you got out of there since it didn’t feel right! As long as you are ok, all is fine and dandy. Take care and be well, friend!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. He was a complete gentleman and quite nice, I didn’t feel pressured but had to leave for myself.

      I wouldn’t have chosen anyone’s apartment that I don’t know. But, I arrived in daylight and we went right to the rooftop with others. Once I felt safe with him then it was ok.

      I love that line from sex and the city! And I think I need to take more pages from their book!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. That scares me. Really it does. What if he turned out to be some wacko??? A wacko with a knife??? Or has some disease in his mouth, YUCK! I’ll stick to my vibrator that’s for sure…you have some guts Madeleine! Really you do…But pls be careful. The world isn’t safe with crazy people around

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes you are right and my friends reminded me of this.

      The disease thing…that’s a really tough one honestly. We make choices. I can’t wait around for drug tests before I have sex each time. Nor do any single women I know. While this sounds counter-intuitive, I think it’s a gut thing based on the human you are with.

      Risk. Absolutely.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Jana – you are welcome to comment any time – no judgement here!

      I admit, I like to drink. And I drink a lot. And it gets me into trouble.

      I am learning not to let it get me into trouble I don’t want.


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